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How to stop people from ruining your life

Updated: Nov 9, 2020

Narcissists. Sociopaths. Cheaters. Thieves. The neighbour that lets their dog poo on your front lawn every day. Who are the people that are wreaking havoc on your life? And how can you stop them?

I often say that the only person you can change is yourself, and that’s true. However, when you change yourself, that’s not all you’re doing. None of us exist in a vacuum. We are all connected, and when you change yourself, you change how other people respond to you. Here are 3 ways that this can be demonstrated.

1. Body language and non-verbal cues

How do you carry yourself when you’re feeling happy, or confident? Compare that to how you carry yourself when you’ve had a bad day, or are feeling sad or depressed. Do you think that has an effect on how other people treat you? Think about how you would respond to your partner or friend if they walked in with a big grin on their face, versus a scowl.

In some places, this can be the difference between you getting home safely and being relieved of your possessions. It turns out that it only takes 7 seconds for a criminal to decide if someone is an easy target, based on non-verbal cues*. By changing your body language and non-verbal cues, you can affect other people’s behaviour.

2. Magnetoencephalogram (MEG)

Yep, it’s a bit of a mouthful. A MEG is a type of scan that reads your brain activity by measuring the magnetic field around your brain. You may or may not be familiar with electroencephalograms (EEG), where you stick electrodes on your scalp and see the brain activity as wavy lines displayed on a monitor. MEG is similar to that except that the brain activity is measured from outside of the body, without contact. Why does this matter? It means that your thoughts are not confined to the inside of your own head If you’ll allow me to get physical (ha!), thoughts are produced by electrical signals in your brain. And wherever there is an electrical current, there is a corresponding magnetic field. If you change the current, you change the field. It also works the opposite way, so if you are exposed to an external magnetic field, the electrical currents in your brain (i.e. your thoughts) can also be affected.

What’s my point here? Your thoughts affect the thoughts of everyone around you, even though you’re not aware of it. It all happens subconsciously. We are in constant communication with the people around us, without ever having to say a word. You have the power to change the people around you by changing your thoughts. Let’s take this a step further with #3.

3. Quantum physics

I need to start this section off with an admission: I am not a quantum physicist.

But here’s how I understand it. If you look closely enough at anything, you’ll find that there’s nothing there. There’s only energy. Everything is made of it. You, me, and the phone or computer you’re reading this on. Our physical reality is shaped by the quantum field, like a magnetic field organises iron filings. The relevance of this is that energy is non-local. This is my point from #2, supercharged. We think that we are each separate, physical entities, but that is just our perception. If we are fields of energy, then where does one person end and another begin? We are all interconnected, all broadcasting and receiving energy to and from the field.

Energy is more powerful than words. Sometimes you meet someone and their energy, their vibe, doesn’t match what they’re saying. You get “gut feelings” about people when they walk into a room. Have you ever been thinking about someone and they happen to call or text just at that moment? Coincidence? Maybe. But I believe that our thoughts have power, and that by changing ourselves we change the field, and that affects everyone and how they respond to and act towards us.

So how to stop other people from ruining your life? Change your energy. How do you do that? By changing your beliefs. Your beliefs are what determine your thoughts, perceptions, attitudes and behaviours. Changing them will change how you feel, the energy that you’re broadcasting, your body language and all of the other non-verbal cues that people respond to.

When you change your limiting beliefs to supportive ones you can start to emanate joy, confidence, control and power. You’ll no longer be perceived as a target, and you'll start to attract the right people and things into your life.

Change your beliefs quickly and easily with PSYCH-K®. Want to find out if this can work for you? Schedule a free Q&A call to discuss your specific situation and needs.

*The Seven-Second Rule: How to Avoid Being an Easy Target

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